Sometimes, I think we let our brains and our hearts get away with things they should not, when in utter delusion we create grand aspirations of fanciful things and wonderful scenarios. We are unable to see that the road we head down--full-speed ahead and with great excitement--leads to but an impasse, created by the chasm of cruel reality that separates what we want and where we stand. But today I see this crevasse for what it is. I've long held on to certain dreams that I know realize are unfortunately far from reality. This past year, I've clung to the belief that medical school was just around the corner. With my whole heart, I believed that this year would finally be it, that some school would finally call me up and say, Yeah, we want you. In acts of encouragement, some have told me, "There must be a reason God made you wait until now." I guess the real reason is that I'm just not cut out for it. And this grandiosity has amounted to nothing, really. I'm not quite sure where that leaves me--that I have yet to figure out.